Then this accident happened. After the major surgery, I went through a lot of painful rehabilitation and will take several months to get me back to normal. Then to make matters worse, my doctor also said it’s likely I will have some form of pain and numbness all the time.
Suffice to say it’s a very stressful time for me. As I was recovering at home after the surgery, I started to get furious at my whole situation. As the days went on, my anger became worse. I started taking it out on my family and even my co-workers.
Instead of looking at how fortunate I was that the accident did no real damage and count my blessings, I was focusing on why this happened to me.
Just like Tobit who went blind through no fault of his own because he decided to sleep under a tree, my true character started to show.
Writing this made me realize that I can’t allow what happened to me change me for the worse. I am reminded of the words from Saint Claude De La Colombiere, and I quote:
“When I see a Christian grief-stricken at the trials God sends him I say to myself: here is a man who is grieved by his own happiness. He is asking God to be delivered from something he ought to be thanking Him for. I am quite sure nothing more advantageous could happen to him than what causes him so much grief. If we could discover the designs of Providence, it is certain we would long for the evils we are now so unwilling to suffer. It is true that sudden great misfortune at the moment it comes may appear to overwhelm you and not allow you the opportunity there and then of profiting by it. But wait awhile and you will see that by it God is preparing you to receive the greatest marks of His favor. But for this accident you would not, perhaps, become less good than you are, but you would not have become holy. It was only this final step that prevented you from attaining the perfect freedom of the love of God. The misfortune which has befallen you will soon do what all your exercises of piety would never have been able to do.”